If someone gives you something, do you feel obligated to return the favor?
Robert Cialdini, best-selling author of the book Influence: Science and Practice, has an entire chapter on the power of reciprocation. People feel a powerful need to reciprocate. In fact, the need is so powerful that people will actually say “yes” to things that they would not have normally said “yes” to. He provides several interesting examples. In one example, he examines an experiment conducted by Dennis Regan in 1971.
Here’s how the experiment worked: Two subjects were both asked to rate the quality of some paintings as part of an experiment on “art appreciation.” However, one of the two subjects, wasn’t really a subject. He was “Joe” - Dennis Regan’s assistant - posing as another subject in the “art appreciation” experiment. In addition, this really wasn’t an art appreciation experiment. It was an experiment to test the idea of reciprocity.
Dr. Regan brought in several subjects one by one, and teamed them up with “Joe” who pretended just to be another subject. Each time Dr. Regan ran the experiment with a new subject, he’d have “Joe” do one of two things.
- For half of the subjects who were asked to participate in the experiment, “Joe” and the subject would rate art for awhile, and then Joe would leave the room during a break and would return with two Cokes. He’d offer one to the subject.
- For the second set of subjects, he’d leave the room during the break and just come back. He didn’t even mention a Coke.
Now for the real experiment…
For all of the subjects who participated, at the end of the day “Joe” would ask the subject to do him a favor. He told the subject that he was selling raffle tickets for a new car, and that if he sold most of the tickets, he would win a $50 prize. The tickets were 25 cents each, and the more they could buy, the better. You can guess what happened, right?
The subjects who “Joe” gave a Coke to earlier in the day purchased twice as many tickets. That’s the power of reciprocity. Pretty powerful idea, right? I bet your wheels are spinning wondering what you can give away to be able to have these kinds of results. And you’re probably also thinking about all the people who have pulled this same trick on you.
This is the reason why most major companies prohibit their managers from accepting any kind of gift from outside vendors. They know that it’s easy to influence people with something as small as a nice dinner or tickets to a Broadway play.
How do you employ this idea of reciprocity in a Kosher way? While I don’t think there’s anything wrong with having a nice meal with a customer on occasion or buying them a small and meaningful gift from time to time provided the intent is genuine, but the best Kosher thing you can give away is knowledge. By teaching people how to do things better, you create a real bond and they will have a strong desire to help you as well.
I’ve actually come to the conclusion that the more generous you are with knowledge, wisdom and guidance, the more you’re rewarded. And while it’s true that you may not receive back the same gift from everyone, overall you and everyone around you will benefit. And even if you were to give away all of your knowledge, it’s your experience that’s truly valuable.
What types of knowledge can you impart to your customers that will help them form a closer relationship with you? What can you give them that will help them be more successful in their business, so they need to buy more from you?
Be good. Market Smart.
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